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Best of Late Night

Samantha Bee Unloads on Eric Schneiderman

Samantha Bee said she did not feel at all conflicted about condemning Eric Schneiderman, New York’s former attorney general, who is accused of physically abusing romantic partners.Credit...TBS

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Eric Schneiderman, New York’s former attorney general, may have been a longtime champion of women’s rights, but he now stands accused of beating and verbally abusing multiple women. After hearing the accusations against him, Samantha Bee said that she didn’t feel at all conflicted about condemning the onetime liberal darling.

“Now, Schneiderman was a guest on my show, so this is a little complicated for me to talk about, but — just kidding, it’s not complicated.” — SAMANTHA BEE

Schneiderman’s willingness to take on domestic abusers in the political sphere didn’t make Bee any less ready to bid him good riddance.

“Eric Schneiderman, you are trash and we do not need you. Tarana Burke started the #MeToo movement 11 years ago on Myspace. It will keep moving forward without you just fine.” — SAMANTHA BEE

“You know who’s a better advocate for women? Women! Last night’s primaries made that very clear. Women ran in 23 open Democratic House primaries — in Ohio, West Virginia, North Carolina and Indiana — and they won 18 of them. And remember Rachel Crooks, one of the women who accused Trump of sexual assault? Last night she won a nomination for the Ohio state legislature. The future is female, or at least it better be, because I am done with this [expletive].” — SAMANTHA BEE

Bee also revisited the sexual-misconduct accusations against prominent men in the news media and entertainment worlds. Eventually she got to Charlie Rose — who was recently said to be considering hosting a comeback television show that focuses on accused men. Ms. Bee revealed that she had experienced his sexual oversteps firsthand, saying that he had planted an unwanted kiss on her lips before she appeared on his show years ago.

“He greeted me, a stranger-slash-colleague, with a kiss square on the lips with just a hint of tongue — like a turtle softly eating an apple core. Basically like this [imitates a turtle]. At the time I thought he was just the average gross old man; it turns out he was so much worse. So no more TV shows for you.” — SAMANTHA BEE

She also made fun of Rose for the skimpy attire that some former female employees said he wore around them.

“No one should be wearing a robe at work. Charlie Rose, you and I basically do the same job. I say some stuff about the news, I interview people, I supervise — and at no point have I ever woken up in the morning and thought: ‘You know what I should wear in front of my employees today? A whisper of a garment that a gentle breeze could render irrelevant!’” — SAMANTHA BEE

News surfaced on Tuesday that Michael Cohen, President Trump’s personal lawyer, had sold access to Trump and insights into the president’s thinking to private companies for hundreds of thousands of dollars. The companies included some with ties to Russian oligarchs.

Meanwhile, the shell company that received the payments was the same one that Cohen used to send hush money to Stephanie Clifford — also known as Stormy Daniels — on Trump’s behalf.

“It’s pretty crazy; the Stormy Daniels money could be traced all the way back to Vladimir Putin. In response, Putin said, ‘Donald can spend allowance however he wants.’” — JIMMY FALLON

Seth Meyers made fun of Cohen for the conspicuous name he had given the shell company — Essential Consultants L.L.C. — and ridiculed the Trump administration for failing to limit information about Cohen’s work. Meyers singled out Rudolph Giuliani, a new member of Trump’s legal team who gave some freewheeling TV interviews over the past week.

“We’re only finding out about it because Trump hired one dumb lawyer to set up a shell company and another dumber lawyer to go on TV and lie about it. Giuliani and Cohen are like Cellino & Barnes if, instead of fighting asbestos, they snorted it.” — SETH MEYERS

“Einstein Brothers bagel shop is now serving mac-and-cheese bagels. So if you love bagels, and you love mac and cheese, I hope you have a great personality.” — SETH MEYERS

“This is a major diplomatic win for the president. You know, the last time Trump brought a prisoner back from a foreign country, she became first lady. And that worked out great.” — JIMMY KIMMEL, responding to news that North Korea had released three American hostages

This is the wrong guy to text by accident.

All of us have old teachers we’d like to apologize to, right?

Donald Glover, the actor and writer who also makes music as Childish Gambino, will sit down with Jimmy Kimmel on Thursday. Glover hosted “Saturday Night Live” last weekend and soon after released a striking music video for “This Is America,” his latest single.

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Taylor Swift, left, and Katy Perry.Credit...Invision, via Associated Press

Taylor Swift and Katy Perry are trying to patch things up after a yearslong public spat. But why were they feuding in the first place?

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